Overheard: Possible Proposal

6 Dec

No, not me, but a co-worker of mine.  A few girls got together to gab about life when one asked another about her relationship.  Apparently, she has been with her guy for a few years and the others wanted to know, well, when is he going to pop the question? 

Now usually, if someone asks that question, you kind of laugh it off and say, I don’t know (even though deep down inside, you’re hoping TOMORROW!), but she actually had an answer:  “In the spring.”

I nearly fell out of my chair and it wasn’t because of the subsequent stream of squeals that happened.   Maybe its because I’m ignorant in these matters (and in that case, someone, please school me) but do people really plan proposals now?  I always thought it was supposed to be a surprise?  Ok, ok, so it shouldn’t exactly come as a surprise to you that your lover wants to take the relationship to the next level, especially if you guys have been together for quite some time.  But the fact that she knew when it was going to happen kind of took me by surprise.

And maybe I might be reaching here, but it might also be a practical thing to start planning proposals instead of doing them willy nilly.  These days everyone has a 3-5 year plan and I get the feeling that “marrying my future spouse” doesn’t get put in there too often.  It isn’t just the wedding planning that can change things, but adjusting to and being married can cause you to change your goals.  So instead of just surprising your love with your commitment, I guess it might make sense to plan that commitment. 

But apaprently, this is the norm since the other girls, who were married, all told stories of how they knew it was going happen before it even happened.   However, their knowing, was more of a feeling, rather than a predetermined time.   The funniest story was of the woman whose guy never planned one dinner in their entire relationship, but then one night decides to plan dinner.  I guess that had PROPOSAL written all over it.

It could be that I’m young, hopeless, romantic or a combination of all three, but I want my proposal to be a surprise.  I definitely do not want it in a public place like a park or a restaurant.   I want it to be intimate too (nothing scandalous, just that its something special between myself and my guy, a story I wouldn’t be telling everyone!).  But maybe these things might be too much to ask for, or worse, they diminish the importance of what’s truly happening:  that on that day, I’m taking the first step to beginning the rest of my life with another.

-A

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One Response to “Overheard: Possible Proposal”

  1. Mrs. H December 6, 2011 at 9:39 PM #

    My proposal was a complete surprise! I like you am a bit old fashioned and I very much am a romantic at heart so I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. Though it has become the norm for those around me now to start planning their proposals. I just had a friend recently wed on the 3rd. I remember when I spent time with her last summer she told me her hubby was going to propose for Christmas 2010 (which he did) and they would probably wed in December 2011 (which they did). Their reasoning was finances. Since the ring, just like the commitment is a huge investment they kept nothing secret and planned every step. I say to each his/her own.

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